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July 12, 2013 / nuttystepmom

glorious men: they are who they are

So, CindyLou, it’s time to talk about the fellas. Of course, there are approximately 900 billion topics to cover here, but today we’ll just talk about one idea…and it’s an important one, so pay really close attention.

In your life, you will hear women make all sorts of comments about “training” men or “changing” men or finding a “fixer upper.” Those women are uppity idiots, and you should promptly disregard every word that comes out of their mouths. Men are not pets or cars or houses. They don’t need trained. They don’t need to be changed. Seriously, just take a moment to think about how you would feel if someone believed they were “training” you to be a good girlfriend or wife. It’s degrading, sexist, and mean. Don’t be that chic.

Here’s a truth: If you feel like a guy needs to change to make you happy, then he’s not the guy to make you happy. It is not your responsibility or right to change another human.

Here’s another truth: The guy that you like just the way he is? That’s the one for you. Does that mean he’s going to be perfect and never annoy you or upset you? Absolutely not. Guess what? You’re going to annoy and upset him, too. Working through all of that crap together (and still liking each other at the end)…that’s where a real relationship happens.

One more truth: You cannot respect a person you are trying to change. Do you respect a dog that you’re training to sit? Do you respect the walls that you’re changing by applying paint to them? No, you don’t. Without mutual respect, a relationship is doomed to fail.

That’s all for today, chickadee. Tomorrow I’m going to teach you something really important about lemons. You see how I’m bouncing back and forth between things that actually matter and random brain thoughts with these posts? Yeah, that’s your stepmom. šŸ˜‰

Thoughts to add about avoiding the “training” mentality? Go ahead and pop that advice for CindyLou into the comments!



Leave a Comment
  1. linbeth / Sep 2 2013 10:45 am

    Just had to reblog you on this one. For my own future reference. I knew I wasn’t wrong to think the way I did about respect and so forth. Great post, thanks for sharing šŸ™‚

    • nuttystepmom / Sep 2 2013 10:49 am

      I’m glad you enjoyed it! Personally, I don’t think you can ever go wrong with the respect thing. šŸ™‚

  2. rajnishmishravns / Sep 3 2013 3:29 am

    A new perspective. Fresh too!


  1. glorious men: they are who they are « Stargazer's Haven

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